The Walk of Shame

We're all familiar with the phrase "the walk of shame," some more than others. You know that walk. The one that happens the morning after a night of whoopee that you weren't quite expecting to be an entire night of whoopee. So then you end up skulking out of Mr. Man's place at 7 a.m. in your yesterday clothes, your bra in your purse and no makeup except maybe some well deserved chapstick, hoping you don't bump into any of his neighbors on the way out to your car--wherever that is at this point. You're not even sure. Did you drive to his place, or did you leave yours on the street near the bar all night? You might still be a little foggy about how all this went down last night. Worst than running into his neighbors is the possibility of running into yours as you pull into your driveway and greet them on their way out to work. Not that they are your parents or anything, but even so, it's just plain embarrassing.

What might be more embarrassing is if you don't have time to go home before work and you show up at the office in, yessiree Bob, yesterday's outfit! This little scenario happened to one of the women in my office...more than once. It's a small office. Unless one of us is hiding at her desk all day, we're going to see each other and probably notice what we are wearing, because we are women, after all.

Let me just clarify, this woman is not a complete tramp, a trollop or tart. She is actually dating someone. She just happens to be really bad at planning ahead. The first time this sort of incident occurred she showed up in the exact same outfit, of course. What was she to do? The second time it happened (today) she stands in front of me saying "does it look like I wore this outfit yesterday?" Now I recalled her wearing a flowy flowery skirt, but that's really all I remembered about her outfit yesterday. I chuckled knowing what she meant and suggested she start buying clothes she could turn inside out. At that point, she turned the hem of her skirt up to show me the side she was wearing yesterday. She had actually worn a skirt she could turn inside out! One of our colleagues suggested she could hoist the waistband of the skirt up over her boobs and wear it like a strapless dress tomorrow should she find herself in the same predicament for a third time.

Another woman advised her to start buying travel clothing that can be tightly rolled up to fit snugly into an evening purse or handbag. No ironing necessary! Or maybe it'd be to her benefit if she worked with women her same size so they could swap clothes once at the office.

I suggested she tell her fella she needs a drawer.

At one point there was a comment about what would happen if I got lucky tonight and had to slink into the office wearing the same outfit. There was a very slight pause before we all agreed I'd be strutting through the office pointing out that I was, in fact, wearing the same outfit as the day before. It's been a looooong time since these shoes have treaded down the path of shame.
And I'm kind of glad my friend at the office has no shame, as her behavior provides so much entertainment for the rest of us walking the straight and narrow.